Every era has had a unique flavor of love.
Some people used to believe that the best way to love was to drop down on one knee and be there for each other as man and wife. Others believed in romantic gestures and the fairytale sweeping off of feet.
And while newer generations find it hard to understand the flavor of love from eras long gone by, if people are honest with themselves, the millennial flavor is the weirdest of them all.
After all, is it really love if a person falls for someone they have never met in their life and only interacted with in chat rooms? Is it really love if they don't have to be physically present to give each other gifts and flowers on their birthday? Is it really love if they can break up with one text and then block the ex everywhere?
So yes, old-fashioned ways of loving someone might not be in vogue now but couples can definitely take inspiration from them to strengthen their love lives in this millennium.
So here are 20 old-fashioned things all couples should do to grow closer.
And make sure to pay attention to the tips on how to mend rifts and bring the spark back into a boring love life!
20 Send Handwritten Letters In The Mail
It might be easier to knock out an email in half an hour and tell your beloved all that you feel when you live apart (or even do so via text messenger), but it cannot compare to the joy of receiving a handwritten letter in the mail.
Why? Because sending someone a letter in mail tells them you are willing to go an extra mile to put a smile on their face.
After all, it isn't easy to write a letter in one go and not have to scratch out a few lines or fix some misspelled words. Neither is it easy to write it legibly and then find an envelope to put it in. Or for that matter, figure out how many stamps you will need to stick on before you drop it off at the post office.
19 Greet Them At The Door When They Come Home
Yes, we know it isn't possible to always do so, especially when you are in the middle of a chore and can't hear the key turn in the lock or have already gone to bed. But that's not the point.
The point is to greet your partner when you are aware they have just come back home. Even if it means yelling out a "Welcome home!" and "I'll be there in a minute" in case you are doing something.
So, greet when they come back, give them a hug if you can, and ask if they would like to have a glass of water.
It's not about being well-mannered. It's about being a warm presence that your partner would want to come back home to.
18 Leave Little Love Notes In Their Clothes
Every once in a while, surprise your partner with a little love note in their shirt pocket. Or under the lid of their laptop. Or one inside their shoe!
The point is to be creative and leave them with a one-liner (or many) that will instantly put a big smile on their face.
And it doesn't just have to be funny, cheesy, or romantic. You can do this to apologize too when you are afraid of their reaction.
Just make sure you leave the note in a place where they will definitely find it. Because it won't be any fun if you have to ask after three days if they found something in their briefcase's side chain (which they rarely use).
The bathroom mirror works too!
17 Put A Smile On Their Face With Little Treats
Does your girl love sunflowers? Surprise her with one when you meet her next. Does your man love M&Ms? Give him a packet one night with a kiss while you are watching TV together.
The idea is to know the little things that make your partner happy and treat them with it every now and then. Because we know how happy we would be if someone did that for us.
So, since love is about giving, give first. Your partner will love the gestures and it will keep the spark going in your relationship!
16 Dress Up Well And Go Out On A Cozy Date Night
And by that, we don't mean once a year on your relationship anniversary or every six months on each other's birthdays. We mean, schedule a day as 'date night' every month. Perhaps the second Sunday or the third Saturday.
Then dress up well and go out!
Go dine out at a posh restaurant. Tour a part of the city you two have never been to before. Head over to an amusement park. Or even just stroll around a park while eating corndogs!
Just make sure to check in with your partner at least a few days before the date night so both of you are ready for it or can reschedule it to a different day in case there's a deadline approaching at work.
15 Express Gratitude Every Day
You don't have to gaze into each other's eyes every single day and say a lengthy "Thank you for being in my life because..." That's something you should definitely do from time to time (perhaps even once every weekend), but the point of expressing gratitude is to be grateful for even the small things.
So if they fix breakfast for you, thank them for the wonderful meal. If they console you after you had a tough day at work, thank them for being such a sweet person and supporting you. If they do all their chores on time, thank them for being such a considerate partner and making your house feel like a home.
It's all about appreciating the little things that most people take for granted. Because when you do that, your partner's love for you will grow with every day that goes by.
14 Keep A Coin Jar
Well, it doesn't have to be a coin jar. It can be a cash jar too (since coins don't have as much value as they used to a hundred years back). The idea is to have a special jar where you can keep adding funds for something both you and your partner are looking forward to. Like, a vacation in the Maldives. Or, a couple's work table for your home.
You can also maintain a 'fight jar' where you put in coins whenever you both have a tiff and take out a coin when you can through a full day without fighting even once.
If the jar fills up fast, you know there's a problem in the relationship that needs a proper sit-down conversation.
13 No Electronics During Conversations
Studies have shown that when people two people are having a conversation and there's a phone (or phones) on the table before them, the quality of the conversation tends to be shallow and poor. It's the same even when the phone is kept face down!
So maintain a strict no-electronics rule whenever you are having a conversation or have planned to do something together. It will improve the quality of your couple-time greatly and that, in turn, will have a positive impact on your relationship.
12 Eat Dinner Together
Remember your family dinner time? We mean the one before the smart-phone age where people actually used to talk to each other, ask about their days, and feel connected. This ritual will do the same for your relationship.
It's like a mini-date every day!
And it doesn't have to be dinner if both of you have different work timings. Try to have at least one meal together. Breakfast would do too!
The idea is to start or end your day on a good note and feel the love growing stronger between you.
11 Show Up At Their Place With A Surprise
Sometimes that surprise can just be you. Like, when you live in different cities or two parts of the world. Although to pull this off, you will need the help of at least one friend of theirs.
Other times, you can ask them to look outside the window and be standing there with a bunch of roses or a box of doughnuts in your hand.
The surprise doesn't have to be your presence though. You can gift them a spa experience, just because. Or, tell them to pack their bags for the weekend because you are taking them to a clandestine location.
10 Send Them A Care Package
Care packages are all a rage right now. From the pages of Pinterest to the dorm rooms of college first-years, they seem to be everywhere.
But what you may not know is that it's not a new thing at all. It has been around forever.
So show your partner you care for them and make them a care package filled with messages and munchies that make them think of you whenever they pull something out. Just be sure to put a lot of thought into it and pack in only those things you know they love or things you are sure they will enjoy. Like, a fresh stick of their favorite lip balm or a book they haven't read but want to.
The best part is, care packages aren't just for long-distance relationships. You can make one for your partner-at-home and keep it hidden somewhere until it's all done!
9 Cook Their Favorite Meal For Them
Here's the thing: don't try to cook a meal for them if your cooking skills are limited to boiling an egg and making instant ramen. Instead, ask them what is their favorite kind of easy-to-make sandwich and then surprise them with a plateful of it one day.
The point is to cook for them what they love to eat according to your skill level. After all, we all have more than one kind of food we love a lot!
And if your skill is MasterChef level, go all in and cook them a full Sunday brunch or dinner one day!
8 Slow Dance At Home
If your partner is not keen on doing this at first (like, when they are the shy, two-left-feet kind), assure them that you will never judge them and that you just want to relax with soft music in the background.
Then hit the music and dance slowly around the room.
Hug each other from time to time so the awkwardness goes away (if it's present), and twirl around if you want. It sets up the mood for better things and helps both of you feel the passion you still feel for each other.
Bonus points if you can dance to a peppy song and fool around. Because laughter is the best glue in the relationship!
7 Read To Each Other
If you and your partner are both avid readers, you should definitely try reading aloud to each other.
Just pick a book you both want to read and then take turns reading aloud a chapter from it every night. It's a great conversation fodder, plus it will feel like both of you are on a journey together.
This tip works best for poetry and fiction. But if you and your partner are both trying to change a habit or learn something new, you can do so with a non-fiction book too!
6 Write A Poem
Well, it doesn't have to be a contender for the Nobel-prize for Literature. But a love poem would definitely put a smile on your partner's face and a zing in their heart.
And if you are not a poet, you can steal a famous poem and then change the words in them to make it sound more appropriate for your relationship. Like, a funny parody!
If that sounds hard too, just go with 'Rose are red, Violets are blue...'. That's a sweet one.
5 Go To Bed At The Same Time When Possible
Don't bother with this if you both have different work schedules and can't do this. But if Netflix is the reason why you don't sleep together (we are talking to you binge-watcher!), you really don't have an excuse.
The point is, most of us don't drop off to sleep right away as soon as our heads hit the pillow. So when you go to bed together, you and your partner can spend some time lying in the darkness listening to each other's voice in the silence or even engage in a pre-sleep cuddle session.
Trust us, when we stop using one sense (our sight in this case), it heightens all the other. And that's the reason why this tip is a really good one for bringing the spark back into your love life if you have lost it.
4 Surprise Them With Tickets To Watch A Play
Not many people go to see a play these days. Or a ballet performance. Or, for that matter, even an opera.
So surprise your partner with tickets to go see one.
If they have never been one before, it will be the perfect way for them to experience something new. In fact, you might have never experienced something like this either!
The point is, it will be something different from a regular movie night. And you will be surprised what kind of conversations you will end up having afterward. Even if you end up snoozing through the the whole thing!
3 Go On Leisurely Walks
There's something magical about strolling around the block hand-in-hand with your bae. It's such a simple thing, yet so powerful in bringing two people closer.
In fact, it sometimes can remind you of your leisure walks while you were just dating each other!
We suggest making this an everyday ritual, even if it's just for ten minutes. It would be the perfect way to show each other that you are care at least once a day.
Tip: a long ride in a car or a bike is not a good alternative because you won't be able to completely disengage from the road while you interact. And you shouldn't!
2 Hold Hands And Give Them A Tight Squeeze
Sometimes the simplest things in life give us the most pleasure. Like, eating a one-penny candy that we used to love while we were seven or watching a movie that was our favorite when we were 15.
So reach out for your partner's hand at least once a day and give it a tight squeeze. And maybe even a peck of love.
You can do it while you watch TV, have dinner, or even before going to sleep. What matters is to reach out and let your partner know with your touch that you really love and cherish them.
1 Play Board Games
And finally, here's a fun, old-fashioned thing you should definitely add to your repertoire of fun things to do together–play board games together! Or even card games.
We suggest buying games that are engaging and fun at the same time, like Organ Attack, Uno, and Monopoly. Or, play the classics, like chess.
In fact, there are board games designed just for couples that will spark a conversation you would have never had otherwise. So explore and see what interests both of you!
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